Waiting and psychologically pregnant

Days are longer when you are waiting. No word from social worker managing the kids case yet. We were told they are accepting homestudys until the end of the month, and it will likely take up to four weeks to review every case that comes in. I expect we may hear something in February… if we are picked for this match.

Lots of nervous energy and anxiety lately. I don’t want to get ahead of myself and start decorating kids rooms just yet. The rooms are an empty canvas ready for the kids to decorate their very own room. The rush of preparing for the homestudy is over. Nervous energy still abounds though even as we are both back to work and our busy schedules are taking over. So much I feel we should be doing right now to get ready for the massive change that is coming, but feeling a little frozen on some things.

The waiting in adoption is tough for sure and trying to relax enough to enjoy this preparation time with so many things still unknown is a challenge.

Resolve has good advice about letting yourself be psychologically pregnant during the wait time. I am doing good on some areas, and not so good on others.

 It is hard to know if you should nest or when. There is not a specific 9 months to plan. It could be 24 hours, 6 days, 6 months, 6 years before a placement. Ages and sex of child are also an unknown. I want to make a pink bedroom now, but what if we adopt a little girl who hates pink or what if we don’t get this case, but get another one and it is all boys.

My mind races a little too much sometimes. So we have chosen to do some other productive things like prayer of course, building our support system by connecting with other adoptive parents, learning how to respond to comments from those who are not so comfortable with adopting and the foster care system, preparing work for the time we will need off, looking at local day cares in case we do get a sudden foster placement in the meantime, looking for pediatricians and finally, reading up on parenting as a way to feel productive during this waiting period and prepare our hearts and mind too.

I am in love with the Love and Logic books and on my second one.

My dear husband is learning all about how to parent by Darth Vader.

He is special and I love him.